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Its hard to make bad look this good.
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Badness abounded in a recent Pie foray into ICC, but eventually the Piefolk rallied, sacs were busted out, Sindragosa's health was made zero, and a good time was had by all.
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Posted by cakes on Monday, June 07 @ 08:07:26 EDT (40 reads)
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Putricide Pushing Up Daisies
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Since I'm not playing now, in order to do the webpage updates, I have to go to WoWWiki to get information about the bosses that my intrepid guildmates are downing in the game. Imagine my uncontainable "squee" when I pulled up the Professor Putricide entry and found a veritable feast of information to fuel my juvenile love of good old-fashioned fart jokes. "Choking gas bomb?" Seriously?
This dude is my favorite boss EVER, and I've never even done the encounter.
Anyway, Pie killed him. That makes us 10/12. Cutting edge progression speed, etc. Congratulations, dudes!
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Posted by cakes on Monday, May 24 @ 07:13:04 EDT (31 reads)
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Posted by cakes on Wednesday, May 19 @ 08:40:12 EDT (36 reads)
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Hello web travelers. Cakes here, writing from my decadent retirement villa off the coast of Spain. By "coast of Spain", I actually mean "upstairs in my messy computer room, in my crumb-dusted yoga pants and teeshirt, still moderately damp with baby spittle". It is a glamorous life. Oh, to escape into a world again where I am simply a gnome, and all I have to do is push button #2 on my keyboard to hurl pixelated frost bolts at bad mans on the internets.
Nah, just kidding. Wouldn't change things for the world right now, that's why some changes in leadership have come about within the last month. Mambo and I finally passed the Hitler-moustache over to Rockskin and Doroshim, who are now leading the guild as romantic partners. I'm not sure though who plays the wifely role, though I think it may fluctuate based on who feels prettiest that day. They appear to be maintaining the exceedingly low standards that Mambo and I built the guild upon all the way back in '05. Gracious, 2005 seems like a long time ago, doesn't it? Back then, Fallout Boy was still on the top 40 charts, Facebook didn't really exist, and Nurdz had just started puberty. It was a good year.
Anyway, some bosses have been defeated. I haven't been able to keep up with the updates in light of Pie's remarkably fast progression speed, so these are rather outdated, but, better late than never. Apparently Rotface and Festergut have long since been marked off of Pie's progression list, but I don't have screenshots for those. Thanks for NOTHING, fools!
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Posted by cakes on Saturday, April 24 @ 21:39:59 EDT (41 reads)
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Saurfang pushes up the daisies.
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I guess my trash-talking in the last update riled the Piefolk into a boss-killing frenzy, because the day after, they went and killed another new boss. A one-shot, I'm told? Congrats, heathens!
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Posted by Cakes on Monday, February 22 @ 10:54:35 EST (47 reads)
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Marrowgar, Deathwhisper, Gunship, oh my!
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Pie continues to amaze with cutting-edge World of Warcraft progression! World-class officership is keeping the guild fresh, spicy, and fun while the mister and I take our break. While I do miss the game, what I truly miss is the guild of people, even though raiding progress is slower than a molasses fart and their skill at the game is worse than the Battlestar Galactica series finale.
Because of my lack of playtime, I have an embarrassingly small number of chat screenshots for the update, so I'm going to sit on them and hope they multiply in time for the next update. And if Pie is true to the aforementioned slow-as-hell progression speed, my little one will be learning the ABCs and playing Modern Warfare with her daddy by the time another update is due. I've got time.
Let this be a warning to all Piefolk on my Facebook friends list...none are safe! I can see your pictures!
Happy Valentine's Day, dudes. I love you more than Takeru Kobayashi loves hotdogs dipped in Sprite.
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Posted by Cakes on Sunday, February 14 @ 11:47:13 EST (44 reads)
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Posted by Cakes on Monday, December 28 @ 10:02:08 EST (49 reads)
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I've been busy in The Real World™, so this update will be brief (and a lot of the chat screenies are ones I've been hoarding for a while).
In the news, Pie has cleared Trial of the Crusader! Bring on the Tier 10! Congratulations, dudes.
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Posted by Cakes on Wednesday, October 14 @ 17:48:59 EDT (63 reads)
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Pie has been killing more new boss mans in the World of Warcraft. The tier nine has that "new loot smell"...at least until it gets tainted with the stench of scrubbery that hangs around Piefolk like an egg-salad fart in a Greyhound bus. Also, I heard that Nurdz' gear smells like meatloaf.
I've only got a half a dozen or so guildchat quotes to share this time around, so I'm going to hold on to them until I'm on more. You hoes can feel free to send me some too, and I appreciate big fonts and black backgrounds in your chat window! Mwah.
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Posted by Cakes on Thursday, August 27 @ 19:47:38 EDT (89 reads)
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Progression is our Profession
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Can you believe it? Pie killed another boss in Ulduar, and we are now one Yogg-Saron kill away from clearing the place, and it has happened quickly. Not too shabby for a guild full of bads.
In related news, however...Yogg Saron is freaking hard. The first phase takes "don't stand in things" to a whole new level, with little fart-clouds popping up literally everywhere with the maddening intent to assist you in personally wiping the raid. We could maintain our health bars (and our straight faces) into a few minutes of phase two, but there is so much going on that it was hard to focus on task; tentacles all up under pixelated panties, lightning lasers everywhereomg, a giant, quivering toad-dude in the middle, with little toothy faces all over his back (this turns out to be Yogg-Saron...who knew!?), and PORTALS, WHERE ARE THE DAMN PORTALS? This may take a while, folks. But we are up to the challenge! Pie will persevere!
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Posted by Cakes on Tuesday, August 18 @ 10:52:55 EDT (80 reads)
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Two more to go in Ulduar, and bacon pastries.
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Mimiron has been defeated in Ulduar, after a harrowing evening hammering away at his various robo-body parts! Only two more to go until we've cleared the joint. Let me tell you, folks...this is a FUN encounter, possibly my personal favorite in Ulduar. There is a lot going on to challenge you and your guildmates, and overall, it makes for quite a stimulating raid experience! Well done, Blizzard. I feel good about giving you my $15 this month. (Now about that "additional instances" caca...)
In other news, it has come to our attention that one of our newer members, the creatively-named spacegoat shaman Fromspace is actually a culinary wizard! He posted some photos from his portfolio for us in our private forums recently, and I felt that we had to share some of his glorious creations with the world. I took the liberty of drawing all over them to make it clear just how fantastic they are. These are pastries with bacon in them, folks. BACON. PASTRY. Fromspace, you have come home. Perhaps we should start calling you "Fromheaven"?
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Freya has some hard trash.
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Another quick update for a pretty screenshot! Last night's Ulduar team ventured back in and did another guild first...Freya! Congrats all...well done. One step closer to Yogg-Saron, and not even quite a year behind.
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Posted by Cakes on Saturday, August 08 @ 00:00:49 EDT (89 reads)
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Actual progression, and a Dahms cameo!
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What a week for Pie! We finally progressed in Ulduar, freeing Hodir from Yogg-Saron's nefarious clutches. We also enjoyed a cameo appearance from Dahms of Hordeside, after Blizzard's recent patch lifting the faction restrictions on PVP servers. Good times!
I haven't been on as much as usual, so there isn't a surplus of screenshots, but I wanted to go ahead and do the update sinve we had an actual guild-first kill to report.
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Posted by Cakes on Friday, August 07 @ 12:47:28 EDT (94 reads)
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Happy midsummer, everyone. I don't have a real webpage update this time, as we haven't killed any new Badguys on the Internet™ lately, but I do have a raunchy feast of guildchat screens (aka The Pahner Comedy Hour, for this week's update) and a CONTEST! Since I didn't have an actual in-game screenshot to use, I had to slog through the wasteland of a folder
where I've saved random images from the internets. I found this gem. I
dread the day that someone snoops around in my computer files and sees
the kind of crap I have lurking on my hard drive.
Anyway, I'm sponsoring a caption contest, and
the winner will receive 200 gold from the economically-sound depths of the Pie guild bank (we are FDIC insured). This contest is open to all
members and non-members that read our webpage, and captions can be posted in this thread on our forums (if you wish to participate and haven't registered a username, you will need to do so to post). The winner will be
decided by vote, and my generic caption will be removed, and their
caption will be applied to the image to be featured on the next webpage
update.
Glee!
Also thanks Auryll and Pip for providing some screenshots for this update...I don't remember who sent which, though!
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Posted by cakes on Friday, July 24 @ 11:57:12 EDT (69 reads)
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Taking screenshots is hard.
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Lots going on in Pieland this month! We made another step toward clearing Ulduar, downing Thorim and taking a terrible screenshot to document the kill. I'm told that Keene's mouth had something to do with the kill. Apparently Thorim could hear him all the way from Blizzard's servers in California and cocked up his toes, begging for mercy.
In other news, apparently our very own Bankalt is the top-rated 2v2 shaman on Maelstrom Alliance side, possibly server-wide? I heard this through the juicy grapevine of PVP gossip...if you have information confirming or denying this, let us know! Its a shame 2v2s are being nerfed soon.
We have started doing Naxx25 with the Drunken Troll Thumpers, a guild on Maelstrom even older than ours. Much fun was had by all, new friendships are there for the making, and the loot will make Ulduar just a wee bit easier, so it is a win-win-win situation. We hope the rest of the summer gives us many more hot and sweaty nights in Naxxramas 25 with the Thumpers, under the stipulation that Daulin NEVER SPEAKS ON VENT AGAIN. Ouch.
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Posted by Cakes on Tuesday, June 30 @ 11:57:09 EDT (69 reads)
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Pie's triumphant return to the halls of Ulduar saw two new bosses down, and plenty of hilarity and good loot to go around. This week's adventures taught us many valuable lessons, most importantly that we are still Piefolk, and though we are doing well in Ulduar, we are still not above enthusiastically wiping on trash.
We also learned that Mambo is an expert tank, after his pro-pull of Auriaya with an engineering decoy bunny resulted in a guild-first kill of her. I personally learned that I need to "lrn-2-hotkey" after an attempt to rez a fallen guildmate after battle resulted in my hearthing back to Dalaran mid-raid. Ignis's jiggling cockpot entertained throughout the weekend, we realized that having Pipette around for her magepee on raids is pretty wonderful, and we further proved with science that Canadians "talk funny" after a heated Ventrilo debate about how to properly pronounce "pasta" (Rockskin, we missed you, eh?).
Good times were had by all. Also thanks Julie for some of the chat screenshots for this update!
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Posted by Cakes on Sunday, June 14 @ 17:00:24 EDT (67 reads)
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On the cutting edge of raid progression; five down!
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Pie continues to astound people serverwide as it belly-crawls through Ulduar, knocking out an average of a new boss per week. All joking aside, this particular raid had four Ulduar virgins in it, so congratulations are in order!
I think we all know which piece of loot Kologarn dropped 'specially for Murdz...
Someone would let me know when that stops being funny, right? I wouldn't want to suck the life out of a joke prematurely.
Also a thank-you to Nwmstagg for some of the chat screenshots this time around.
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Posted by Cakes on Tuesday, June 02 @ 10:10:11 EDT (70 reads)
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Been behind on the updates...adventurous (and allegedly inebriated) Piefolk went in on May 9th and cleaned up the first handful of bosses in Ulduar, including a first-kill of Ignis the Furnace Master. Congratulations, flamers! Some of you young whipper-snappers probably don't even know the origins of the quote on the screenshot, do ya? *polishes cougar claws*
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Posted by Cakes on Tuesday, May 19 @ 18:19:36 EDT (82 reads)
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As reported by Volstagg; "Flame Leviathan, Razorscale and XT002 Deconstructor all down. We took at peek at the guy with the arms. Looks fun."
Ignis the Assmaster's trash still hurts, apparently. You'd think with all the rampaging flamers in Pie, we'd be able to master the Furnace Master. Our day will come!
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Posted by Cakes on Friday, April 24 @ 08:36:41 EDT (70 reads)
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